Love is one of the most misunderstood concepts in human experience. We often associate love with expectations, demands, or a subtle desire to mold others into what we think they should be. However, Osho, the enlightened mystic, challenges this notion with his simple yet profound wisdom:
"There is only one way of loving people: to love them as they are. And this is the beauty: that when you love them as they are, they change. Not according to you — they change according to THEIR reality."
Let’s delve into the depth of this teaching and explore how embracing this perspective can revolutionize the way we relate to others and ourselves.
1. The True Nature of Love
According to Osho, true love is free of conditions, manipulations, or agendas. It is not about making someone fit into our idea of perfection; rather, it is about accepting and celebrating their uniqueness.
When you love someone unconditionally, you create a safe and nurturing space for their authenticity to shine. This love becomes a mirror in which they can see their true self without fear or judgment.
Why does this matter?
Because when someone feels truly accepted, their natural essence begins to flourish. They do not resist change; instead, they align with their innate potential. This transformation is not coerced but arises organically, in harmony with their inner truth.
Because when someone feels truly accepted, their natural essence begins to flourish. They do not resist change; instead, they align with their innate potential. This transformation is not coerced but arises organically, in harmony with their inner truth.
2. Transformation, Not Conversion
Osho makes a critical distinction between transformation and conversion:
- Conversion is the imposition of external ideals. It is ego-driven, seeking to reshape others in our image or according to societal norms.
- Transformation is a spontaneous process, an inner flowering that occurs when someone feels unconditionally loved and free to be themselves.
When we approach relationships with the intent to "fix" or "improve" others, we strip them of their autonomy and dignity. On the other hand, when we accept them as they are, we honor their individuality and empower them to evolve in their own way.
3. The Ego’s Game: Manipulation and Control
Osho emphasizes that the desire to change others stems from the ego. The ego thrives on control, seeing relationships as a means to assert its power. This manifests as:
- Pushing: Forcing someone to meet your expectations.
- Pulling: Trying to draw them toward your way of thinking.
- Manipulating: Subtly influencing their choices and behavior.
These actions are not acts of love; they are acts of politics, as Osho puts it. Politics in relationships is about power, dominance, and control—everything that true love is not.
When we engage in these behaviors, we suffocate the essence of the other person and destroy the purity of the relationship.
4. Love and Freedom Go Hand in Hand
Osho’s philosophy revolves around the idea that love and freedom are inseparable. If you truly love someone, you do not bind them; you liberate them.
To love someone as they are means to:
- Support their individuality and freedom.
- Allow them to make mistakes and learn from their own experiences.
- Be a companion in their journey, not the one dictating the path.
This approach requires letting go of our ego-driven attachments and trusting the natural flow of life.
5. The Paradox of Change
The beauty of unconditional love lies in its paradox:
- When you try to force someone to change, they resist.
- When you love them as they are, they naturally evolve.
Why does this happen? Because love, in its purest form, is transformative. It is an energy that heals, nurtures, and inspires. When someone feels this energy, they become more attuned to their true self and are motivated to align with their higher potential—not because they were coerced, but because they were loved.
6. Applying Osho’s Wisdom in Daily Life
1. Let go of expectations:
Start by reflecting on your relationships. Are there ways in which you subtly (or overtly) try to change others? Practice letting go of these expectations and embracing them as they are.
Start by reflecting on your relationships. Are there ways in which you subtly (or overtly) try to change others? Practice letting go of these expectations and embracing them as they are.
2. Create a safe space:
Be a source of unconditional support and understanding. This doesn’t mean tolerating harmful behavior but offering love without judgment.
Be a source of unconditional support and understanding. This doesn’t mean tolerating harmful behavior but offering love without judgment.
3. Focus on self-awareness:
Osho often reminds us that love begins with self-awareness. The more we understand and accept ourselves, the less likely we are to project our insecurities onto others.
Osho often reminds us that love begins with self-awareness. The more we understand and accept ourselves, the less likely we are to project our insecurities onto others.
4. Resist the urge to control:
Instead of trying to shape the behavior of others, trust their capacity to grow and transform in their own time and way.
Instead of trying to shape the behavior of others, trust their capacity to grow and transform in their own time and way.
7. Beyond Relationships: A Path to Inner Liberation
Osho’s teaching is not just about loving others; it is about cultivating a mindset that transcends the ego. When we stop trying to control others, we free ourselves from the burdens of expectation and disappointment.
This freedom allows us to experience love in its truest sense—not as a transaction, but as a state of being.
Conclusion: The Politics of Love vs. The Power of Love
The politics of love seeks to dominate, manipulate, and control. The power of love, as Osho teaches, lies in its ability to liberate, transform, and heal.
By loving people as they are, we honor their individuality and support their journey toward self-realization. In doing so, we not only enrich our relationships but also embark on our own path of spiritual growth and inner peace.
As Osho beautifully reminds us:
"Help people to be natural, help people to be free, help people to be themselves, and never try to force anybody... Those are the ways of the ego."
"Help people to be natural, help people to be free, help people to be themselves, and never try to force anybody... Those are the ways of the ego."
Let us embrace this wisdom and make love a force of liberation, not limitation
Somavati Amavasya, which occurs when a new moon day aligns with a Monday, holds significant spiritual importance in the Hindu calendar. Devotees engage in fasting, rituals, and prayers to honor their ancestors (Pitru) and seek their blessings, believing that these practices bring amplified benefits, including peace, prosperity, and spiritual growth. Bathing in holy rivers, offering Tarpan, and worshipping trees like Tulsi and Peepal are some of the key rituals observed on this day.
Fasting and performing charity are integral ways to celebrate Somavati Amavasya, with many people abstaining from food or water to enhance their spiritual connection. Donations to the poor and worship events, especially those dedicated to Lord Shiva or Lord Vishnu, are widespread. Reading sacred texts such as the Bhagavad Gita or Ramayana is also a common practice, believed to impart wisdom and spiritual insights.
The timing of Somavati Amavasya each year depends on the lunar calendar, with the next occurrence on September 2nd, 2024. Maintaining mental purity, observing fasting in a manner suited to one's health, and avoiding auspicious activities except for spiritual practices are recommended. Observing this day with devotion is believed to bring immense spiritual merit and positive transformations in one's life.
Read more...